College engagements irrational; Learn to be self-sufficient first

Engagement is in the air.Maybe it’s the change of seasons causing these over-zealous lovebirds to take the plunge.

Or is it becoming more of a trend on campus for a couple to get engaged before graduation?

I just visited one of my great friends at TCU, who recently got engaged.

Naturally, I heard the fairy tale love story, the beginning of wedding plans and, for a glimmer of a second, I wondered what it would be like if I were in the same situation.

But as I drove away, I began to think rationally again.

In 2004, the U.S. Census Bureau conducted a study, “Median Duration of Marriages for People 15 Years and Over…”

The total duration for men was eight years, and the duration for women in the same survey was a little over seven years until, you guessed it, D-I-V-O-R-C-E.

In the same U.S. Census Bureau study, 10,000 men and women ages 20 to 24 jumped on the marriage bandwagon.

Well, just off the top of my head I can name at least 10 couples who are engaged.

The real issue isn’t engagement itself (I promise I am not a cynic when it comes to love and marriage), it’s that young couples are not evaluating who they are as individuals before committing themselves to another person.

Let’s face it, college is the time to break away and become self-sufficient, responsible adults.

But, a survey cannot measure the level of maturity and responsibility necessary to make a marriage last.

I am not saying these couples are doomed, but with a divorce rate of 3.6 per 1000 people, according to, a little bit of thinking with your head not your heart would probably produce more lasting results.

For everyone that is not engaged, you have your whole life to be married, so live a little.

Trade the white dress, tux, vows and reception for travel, a fantastic job and life on your own.

And, if your relationship is meant to be, then there really isn’t anything to worry about.

Blythe Duffey is a senior international communication and advertising/public relations major from Kansas City, Mo.