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Tiger Woods has charmed the world for the worse

Welcome back to golf, Eldrick Woods. I noticed that Tiger charmed most of his female idolizers back into favor in between putts and wowed his fellow men into ravenous applause like the 2010 Masters Tournament was his PGA Tour debut.

(For those who only know Mr. Woods as Tiger, Eldrick is his birth name .)

But really, Eldrick, how have you held up through all of this? I read some of those naughty texts Tiger sent, and boy, Elin (Woods’ wife) must have been quite angry.

Tiger had the world fooled, and guess what – the 2010 Masters proved that the world wanted to be fooled. Now it is time for Eldrick to hoodwink Tiger – to stick him back for all the pain he caused himself, his family and fans.

Think “Fight Club” on this one: Edward Norton plays a successful but otherwise average man whose life is systematically built up to mythical proportions by his alter ego (Brad Pitt) and then destroyed.

Tiger has played Pitt’s alter ego role in the life of Eldrick Woods.

Something tells me that Eldrick is a good man and a hard worker who is devoted to his family and his faith. Tiger started as a nickname, but has become a very real persona. Tiger systematically took over Eldrick by manipulating his fans and the media by exploiting all of Eldrick’s hard work and God-given talent.

Something tells me it wasn’t Eldrick who was floozing around with porn stars and a smorgasbord of other broads who were paid to keep their mouths shut.

Something tells me Eldrick didn’t deceive his wife and kids on a scale of such epic proportions that the likes of Michael Jordan and Kobe Bryant would stand up to give a golf clap.

That was Tiger – the same Tiger who took care of Eldrick in the pressroom, in TV ads and on the box of Wheaties. There may have been a little bit of Tiger in Eldrick before the PGA Tour wins and corporate sponsors. Hell, I’d say there’s a little bit of Tiger in everyone. But Tiger had never taken control of someone’s life like it did to Eldrick.

How much of a fight did Eldrick put up against Tiger during his leave of absence, when he reportedly jetted off to a sex rehabilitation clinic?

Edward Norton had to turn the gun on himself in the end, knowing that if he was going to kill his alter ego it might mean he’d have to go down as well. Norton was the lone survivor. He regained control of his life.

Some speculated that Woods would never return to golf, and that the unprecedented level of shame and humiliation was enough for him to call it quits.

If that were the case, both Eldrick and Tiger wouldn’t have survived that self-inflicted wound. Eldrick was too competitive and determined to let that happen, and maybe as a result Tiger survived, clinging to a single fiber of Eldrick’s essence.

It’s time to see if Eldrick finally has what it takes to regain control. Maybe he already has. Was that Eldrick competing at Augusta, or was Tiger just doing some of his best work to date?

Ryne Sulier is a junior news-editorial journalism and political science major from Plano.

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